Tuesday, 3 January 2017

Resolutions to Last

A few weeks ago Hubby & I were discussing the upcoming end of the year. Jake believes that New Years Resolutions are silly & that if people need or want to change things they shouldn’t wait for a new year to do it but start working on it straight away. He has a point, of course. I on the other hand LOVE the idea of New Years Resolutions. For me the ticking over to 12:00am - although not ‘celebrated’ (usually pumping out the z’s well & truly before midnight) - brings hope & excitement. The first day of the first month of a brand new year sings opportunity to me. A fresh start. Another round of birthdays, Easter, Christmas & everything in between. Another 365 days with the knowledge & insight gained from all of the years past; but as is true every year that ticks over, I will have an extra 12 months of wisdom & ideas to guide me. An entire years worth of failures, triumphs, heartaches & joys that I did not have at the beginning of any new year before.

In saying all of this 2017 started in a way that I would never have deemed appropriate of being exciting, hopeful or happy. I woke up on the 1st of January in a 2-star Motel Room with nothing but Milo for breakfast & heading to my in-laws for a get together that would last most of the day. My in-laws aren’t big fans of me, or I them. It was a long day & came out the other side anxious & itching to be home. The support & love I am always surrounded with when I feel downtrodden was on the other end of a 12 hour drive. So instead of waiting until the early hours of the morning to take off, I asked hubby would he very much mind getting his ass in the car - right that instant. He didn’t miss a beat. Packing like we would win a prize if we were faster, we hit the road north at 4:30pm Queensland time.

Through the hours of driving in the rainy darkness I had so much time to think. Between stopping to change shitty nappies & refuel (ourselves & the car) it occurred to me that I still hadn’t made any promises to myself for the year ahead. I contemplated. Lose weight – obviously. Get ahead financially – another obvious one. I went through a few until it occurred to me that each New Years we make resolutions to force ourselves to do the things we hate or that are hard to do. Diet. Exercise. Saving. For me, all of these things come & go. Sometimes we scrooge our way through the months & other times it’s 2-minute noodles for tea & no new razors. Some days I do all things health & fitness. Other days I eat copious amounts of carbs & sugar & nestle myself into the couch so good I need a hand getting up. So no, this year I couldn’t bring myself to decide I wasn’t allowed to eat badly or splurge on the next Lego sale. I knew none of that shit would stick, it never does. I will happily ebb & flow on these.

Then I wondered what actually made my happy. So many things; good books and movies, bubble baths & tattoos, good music & dancing, gardening & baking, taking photos & writing. Little tiny day to day things. Things I have not let into my life quite enough because I have spent so much time deciding to be pro weight-loss & financial gain. I decided to make sure I filled my days with all of these little joys. I also realised that what made me that absolute happiest was my people. My family & friends. Not just them though. Yeah, they go alright, I love them to absolute bits & they of course light up my life but what really makes me swell with excitement, joy & contentment is seeing them happy.

And so my Twenty Seventeen truly begins – and the decision to make myself & everyone in my life as happy as possible. To simply enjoy. I think this one might stick & might be the resolution that lives on into each year.

Happy New Year to all. I hope your days & months fill with everything you hope for to make an amazing year.

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